Our recently turned three year old daughter has given us a run for our money! Don’t get me wrong, she is the ABSOLUTE best, but since the day she turned 1, the “terrible twos” started and haven’t stopped since! Ha!
She is as sweet as can be, but when she doesn’t get what she wants, the tantrum unfolds and its epic. We felt like we tried everything: ignore, time-outs, talk about why she was upset (she shockingly never cooperated with that one!). We even tried using this behavior chart I’m about to share a year ago but we didn’t follow through, so this time I was determined!
My wonderful sister-in-law sent me this behavior chart. I love it because it focuses on rewarding good behavior. I feel like all day long I am correcting or punishing bad behavior so it’s refreshing to highlight the good!
You can find the chart we used here. I loved it because there are so many choices to choose from. We chose 8 we really wanted to focus on, along with calming techniques. We posted it right on the fridge and update it every day. Our goal the first week was to get stars for all of the categories in one day and she would get some M&M’s. Once she received all of her stars for 10 days, she got to pick out a toy at Target – big motivator!
The more consistent I was, the more she bought into it. One main reason for doing this chart was to help her become more independent. So for instance, when she would be having a meltdown about going to the bathroom by herself, I would remind her that she wouldn’t get a star and it would help her snap out of it. I couldn’t get her to do anything by herself without it turning into an argument so this was a huge win!
At the beginning, I was pretty lenient so she could get the hang of it. Then once she did, I wasn’t as lenient and would withhold stars if she didn’t do what she was supposed to.
Five weeks in and she is still just as invested as she was in the beginning. We’ve seen huge improvements and are so happy we did it and stuck with it. I will probably change up the categories in a few weeks. Now onto finding another chart for my almost 5 year old who all of a sudden has an attitude of a teenager!